Mother’s Day is just around the corner.
The other day, I talked about my daughter’s adolescence and rebellious phase…
Today, I’d like to share a little about the moment I realized, “Ah, she’s coming down from the peak,” and the changes that followed.
The hormonal war that had lasted about two and a half years in our household finally came to an end around last November.
I had already started to feel things calming down a bit during the summer.
After entering junior high school, she naturally began to understand more than she did in elementary school. She became more aware of her surroundings and developed clearer opinions of her own like, “This is what I think,” or “This is what I want to do.”
I remember how intense my own rebellious phase was in junior high.
I was constantly irritated with my mom and adults in general.
I hated being treated like a child, being ordered around from above, or having my feelings dismissed without being heard.
So I tried not to do the same to my daughter. I tried not to say the things that hurt me.
But it wasn’t easy.
I ended up saying the very things I hated hearing myself.
I even talked to her honestly about those feelings — how I didn’t mean to, but sometimes I did.
I started making a conscious effort not to command her, not to deny her.
Most importantly, I focused on believing in her.
Back to the story — from around the summer of her second year in junior high, our pointless arguments and clashes drastically decreased.
I remember thinking, “Huh? These fights don’t drag on anymore?”
Our bickering and back-and-forths had become much shorter, and both of us started backing down more easily.
It’s like we both realized, “Endless arguments are just a waste of time and energy.”
That realization — especially on her part — was huge.
It was the turning point!
And from there, things changed quickly.
It felt like we dashed down from the top of Mt. Everest.
I remember it so clearly because my birthday is at the end of November.
Just before my birthday last year, my daughter — for the first time — started thinking, “I want to secretly prepare something my mom would really like.”
That had never happened before.
And when I found out, I was so touched.
It felt like the emotional war of the past two and a half years had finally been worth it — well, maybe not totally erased, but still.
I told her, “Just the thought alone makes me incredibly happy!”
I kept smiling about it even during work. Total mom mode!
Honestly, we parents are so easily swayed.
Just something like this can warm our hearts so deeply.
But even now, it still makes me smile when I think about it. That’s how it is, right?
Before that, she used to hate taking photos with me, but suddenly we were taking silly selfies with fun filters and laughing out loud.
She started being more affectionate.
The prickliness in her tone had softened, and my gentle daughter was slowly coming back.
And that’s how we made it back to solid ground.
Of course, we still bicker often — but that’s just part of life, and it’s okay.
Oh, and there’s more to the birthday gift story…
At that time, what I wanted most was GGUM, the solo song by my Tomorrow X Together bias, Yeonjun.
It had sold out instantly on the official site and wasn’t even available in Korea.
I had completely given up on getting it.
Then one day, at an HMV store we randomly stopped by, my daughter spotted it on the shelf!
She screamed inside her head: “There it is!!!!!”
She imagined secretly coming back to buy it and how I’d be overjoyed when she gave it to me.
But just then, she turned around — and saw me silently holding it in my hands, whispering, “No way… it’s here…”
Her whole plan crumbled in that moment.
That’s when I learned she had been secretly planning a birthday surprise.
She had been thinking about what would make me happiest.
She had decided, “It has to be Yeonjun’s GGUM!” and had been searching for it.
Knowing how much thought and love she had put into it brought me to tears.
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